This is the perennial question: Will the internet ever run out of things that cause immediate division?
Obviously, the powers that be are hoping not. It’s the only thing that really gets the masses involved. No one wants to read a great story, something benign that they agree with. You have to attack someone or defend yourself against an attack.
It becomes a problem. We have had the internet for quite some time now and we have learned a lot about each other.
Colin Quinn has a wonderful special on Netflix called Unconstitutional. I highly recommend it. I watch it a few times a year.
On the show, he compares the pre-internet United States to a dark smoky bar where we each stayed to ourselves and really weren’t aware of what people were doing in other parts of the country. Then when the internet came in it was like someone turned on the lights at closing time and we all got to see the crazy things people were doing all over the country.
It started with what we call things. Sneakers vs tennis shoes. Water vs water fountains. Under against hoagie. That sort of thing. It was fun, but I think we’re starting to run out of regional things to fight for because I’m pretty sure it must be a joke.
I really can’t find anything about it on the internet. If you’re looking for a mustard pumpkin pie, you get the image above a few times. There is a reddit post from 2 years ago with the same photo:
Now there was someone who responded to this on Twitter and said it’s something Ohioans do when they’re done with food to avoid overeating.
Which doesn’t make sense. Don’t eat it. Or put it in the fridge and save it for later. Honestly, I’d rather be known to be a savage who loves mustard on his pie than someone who just throws condiments on my plate to trick me so I’m not fat.
There are no right answers here.
The most likely explanation is that a few years ago someone put mustard on a piece of pie out of boredom, put it on the internet and now strangers are arguing about it.
The Internet is a wonderfully awful place. Thanks for stopping by.